The answer?

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Here is a thought – if you could have the answer to any question, what question would you choose?
Anyway, let’s ignore the question right now. And instead, let’s talk about what the answer is.
A dictionary definition of what an answer is would be “a thing that is said, written, or done as a reaction to a question, statement, or situation.” Another one would be “a solution to a problem or dilemma.”

So, the answer is either simply a response or a solution. So, let’s talk about that for a second.
If an answer is either a response or a solution, it is possible that it can be wrong. It doesn’t necessarily guarantee fact. So, the answer can be anything. Now, think back to the question I posed at the beginning.
“If you could have the answer to any question, what question would you choose?”
Do you remember the question you chose? Good. If you got your answer, would you trust it? I don’t think I would. There are just too many variables at play – is there more than one answer, is the answer I got simply a response or is it a solution, who chose this answer?
So, it is with this mindset, that I find myself in a dilemma – I have a question I want the answer to, but to find out, I must ask someone I do not want to pose the question to. So, instead of embarrassing myself I have chosen to ask other people than the one person who has the answer to my question – and in this case, they have the solution, the final part of the equation I am trying to calculate.
I want an answer, but the fact that I am not asking the person with the solution, suggests to me that I do not want it. I would rather stay in limbo, bemused about the question, than escape limbo and perhaps find the solution is not the thing I want it to be.
Now, thinking about this logically, this type of behavior is not healthy. Avoiding something simply because you might not like the result is probably going to end badly. Or I’ll end up regretting it. However, this is not a post about avoiding that. This is a post thinking about the entire thing.
So, what does this have to do with ‘Health and Fitness’. Well, this is probably about my wellbeing. By writing about it, I feel it’s a form of meditation – while it may not be exactly the same, it does let me get some of the words in my head down on paper. (Well, something similar to it, anyway).
If you have any thoughts about this, I would be interested in seeing what you have to say. Please, leave a comment and tell me whether you try and actively avoid seeking answers, or if you are savvy enough to know how to deal with the chance of failure if you don’t.

Thanks for reading.
Cheers,
Rumanshi.
uestion would you choose?

Self Improvement – The Journey Taken

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14 days ago, I decided “I need to be better”. It’s not the first time I’ve thought it and I highly doubt it will be the last. However, I believe that every time we have this thought, we should give it voice. Not literally, though for some, that may help.
No, when I say give the thought ‘voice’, what I mean is, act upon the thought. For me, I decided to get back into using ‘Habitica’ a gamified task management web app. Now, I started by giving myself impossible goals – the idealized version of myself. And I found myself with a problem.

While I had given the thought ‘voice’, I had set myself up for failure. And I believe this is where most people have gone wrong. Instead of setting simple goals that they can achieve, they set unrealistic goals in order to justify it when they decide to stop trying. At least, that is the problem I found myself having.
And so, after having my ‘character’ die in Habitica a few times, I decided to alter the baseline. Instead of the biggest changes that I could do to improve myself, I’d find the small habits I needed to develop first. And then once I had established those, add a new habit that wouldn’t increase the difficulty too much.

So, this post was written two weeks (14 days) from having that realization. Has the process been successful?
While I can’t say that any habit has been ‘established’ yet, I can say I have been meeting a major goal I think which is beneficial for my life. Every day, I walk 20,000 steps. I have not missed a day yet. Whether it be during work, at the gym on a treadmill, running on the spot at home, I make sure by the end of the day, I always have 20,000 steps taken. No compromises.

The reason I chose this habit is to keep myself active, even on the weekends, as I would do around 10,000 steps on a weekday, but less than 1000 on the weekend. Sometimes it would look like I hadn’t even moved.
And what has this habit done for me?

Well, for one, I am finding it easier to smile. I am finding it easier to run longer distances. I am finding conversing with people easier. I am wanting to improve myself more.
All from a habit that isn’t difficult for me to achieve. Having started doing this habit, I started thinking ‘what else could I do that would make me feel better?’ So now I listen to non-fiction audiobooks, and I try cooking new things.

I even decided to write a blog post for the first time in forever. So, the answer to the question ‘How do I get better than I am’? I believe the answer is simple.

For you to improve yourself, you first must actually want to change.
There is no secret to self-improvement – It is simple a matter of starting.

Cheers,
Rumanshi.

Year Roadmap – (365 Improvement) { 1 }

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  • Every day, spend at least 15 minutes drawing. For this, I will be continually drawing the same character (Koneko Touji – Highschool DXD) in order to see improvements. At the end of the 365 days, I expect to have an ability to draw at least one anime character. I might spend more time learning more, but this is the bare minimum. Currently, the drawing ability isn’t great as seen in these drawings:
    •           {Left: First drawing of day 1} {Right: Second Drawing of day 1}
  • Every day, do at least 2 C# learning courses on Microsoft Docs. Knowing a programming language could be useful, and as I want to play around with the unity engine c# is the language to learn. Maybe one day I will learn other things.
  • Every day, spend at least 20 minutes studying mathematics. Knowing math is important for programming and maybe this will help my head.
  • Play less videogames, read more books. Fairly indicative.

I am beginning on a new journey. One where the end product is a member of society who is no longer stuck in a slump, never understanding the problem is not others but himself. Thus, to fix this problem, one must first fix themselves.

So, the roadmap to improvement:

This is { 1 } as it might change in the future. As the year continues, I might find there are better things to do, more things to know or things I have gotten wrong. Perhaps it will be good, perhaps it will be bad. But the key thing here is, we must strive forward, not backwards on this road that we call life.

Cheers,
Rumanshi.

Coloured Magic – Prologue

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Next chapter: Saturday, 4th September

Leave nothing to chance, for it is the enemy.   

Have you ever felt as though the world is grey, lacking in colour?  As though the people around you are simply drones in a never-ending cycle?  In this modern age, I experience this consistently.   I find that the world is void and empty, lacking anything interesting.   

I don’t know how long I have felt like this, but since it started, everything that once was of interest to me is hard to enjoy.  It’s not as though I can’t find things amusing or laugh, but the once never-ending urge to continue watching is gone.  It is as though the person I am now, is not the person I once was.   

And yet, I still continue on trying.   For the world shouldn’t be so bleak.   The world is full of fascinating things that could entertain others, but for me, the thought that plagues me is ‘so what?’  If it weren’t so, surely I would be in a better place right now.  Instead, I sit here, staring at a wall.  Whose wall is it, though?   Is it the physical wall of the building?   A metaphorical wall?   The walls I put up to push people away?   Or is it something more?  

I do not wish for the world to be grey.   No, in my eyes, the world should be full of colour.   The places we go, the people we see, the things we do – all of them should be bright and wonderful.   Yet, if that’s the case, why is it all I can see is a lack of it.   The people in front of me, dull.   The places I go, arid.   The things I do, monotonous.   

I wonder if there is a way to change this.  Is there a way to change this empty void inside of me?   Is there a god who can help me?   Or am I to continue on like this, devoid of any real emotion?   It’s not a fun way to exist, at all.  

But anyway, that’s how I feel.   It’s probably not how you feel, but can you understand?   That my actions, repetitive as they are, are a way to deal with this reality.  

—— 


While lost in my thoughts, the doorbell rang.  

“Just one sec.”  

I don’t really have many people who will visit, so it’s probably nothing important.   I get up to open the door, and when it finally creaks open… 

“Hi there!  Could I interest you in-” 

A young, black haired man in a suit started to perform his spiel.  Before he could get any further, I put my hand up and interrupted him immediately.  

“Let me stop you right there.   I am unable to buy anything, as I am unable to afford it.  I will not donate to charity, as I am pretty much apathetic.  And I will not convert to a religion, as I care not if I go to heaven or hell.”   

The man, looking startled, just walked away, muttering under his breath.   

I closed the door, and headed back to the couch, preparing to stare at the white wall once more.  But as I approached the couch, a woman in a white dress began to appear.   

“So, the world is dull, is it?”  

“…” 

“What, don’t want to speak your edginess out loud?   Is it embarrassing?”  


“…yeah.”  

The woman laughs, throwing her head back.   Then continues,

“Well, don’t let that bother you.  I don’t really care.  What I’m here for is, do you believe in magic?”  

Given I just saw her phase into existence, I’m going to go with probably.   Unless there’s some super futuristic technology I haven’t heard about.   

So, my name is Ars.  

And this is the story of how I learned magic to colour the world.   

The Harem was a Forced Goal – Ending Explained

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Hi there, I’m Rumanshi.   When I first started writing The Harem was a Forced Goal, I was trying to write a novel with a fresh perspective on tropes.   I still wanted to use them, but make them into a comedic use.   Unfortunately, eventually I ran out of steam in writing this novel and slowly wasted away.  However, I still want to tell you how I had imagined the ending of the novel.   Maybe one day I will re-write the novel with a new perspective.  Here are some of the notes before I tell you what the ending was going to be:

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An Adventure In Alcoholism – Giving up [Day 1]

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It’s been pretty bad recently. My heads been all over the place, and I lost control of my drinking. It hasn’t been good. I’d blame covid, but it’s not really the problem. I thought I had it fairly under control, but recent events have led me to believe that it’s way worse than what I believed.

So, this is time for me to stop drinking again.

[Week 1, Day 1]

So, today I woke up with a hangover. It was unfortunate. So, for a minimum of a month, no drinking. Maybe permanently. I’ll be writing how I feel, the effects of what’s going on in my head.

I’m going to assume that it will only be weeks that effects will show up.

Cheers,
Rumanshi.

The Quintessential Quintuplets – Season 2, Episode 2 Thoughts

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Alright, let’s go for episode 2! You should know the drill by now:

  1. This is a stream of thought post (It’s not formatted well and it is basically me thinking while watching the episode.
  2. There’s spoilers (Who woulda thunk?)
  3. I do this for my own entertainment, and maybe a bit for yours.
  4. January Ad Revenue is terrible, as always.

So they are still doing terribly!

Itsuki, right? Oh no!! Uesagi is dead. No, he’s just sleeping. Too much studying haha. They started studying without him?

What the hell has he prepared. If I was given that I would cry. Don’t run away Itsuki! Oh yeah, I forgot Uesagi is a tsundere protagonist haha.

Who will we see next?

Oh yeah, I enjoy this opening song. La la la la la. La la la.

The Quintessential Quintuplets. Woo.

Miku and Nino in a fight, huh. But no TV due to study haha.

Ichika… Big sister type haha.

Oh my god that was adorable, Ichika. Anyway, some more studying.

Nino, you’re a fool haha.

Oh no Yotsuba, that plan is not going to work. Uesagi is bad with people! How did you forget that.

No, Miku, you’re wrong. He is super creepy.

Itsuki, Uesagi doesn’t have a soul. I think? 1/5th wits. Perfect insult.

I mean, that’s going to hurt him. Tutor for hire. Angry Nino. Uh oh.

Itsuki slapped Nino :O That was unexpected. The slap back was, though.

I don’t think this is picking a side.

OH MY GOD. HE HANDWROTE THEM. WTF IS WRONG WITH UESAGI!?!?! AND MAN, HIS HANDWRITING IS NEAT (I KNOW IT’S FICTIONAL BUT RAWR).

No Nino! Don’t Move Out! I mean sibling fights are normal. But seriously.

Uesagi there’s not much you can do.

Miku and Uesagi are kinda on a date like this, huh? Ahahaha! I forgot my keys strategy works again.

Angry Nino again. I wonder if she works out that Uesagi is Kintaro soon. She better.

Nah, Itsuki wouldn’t be at a luxury hotel. I’m betting Itsuki is there.. At his house.

Yeah, there we go. Predicted completely.

Akward Uesagi, Akward.

Ahaha, she’s staying over. And the sister made them sleep together. 🙂 🙂 🙂 🙂

And now Itsuki and Uesagi are on a date? I guess. Of course he lacks class. He’s Uesagi.

Nino has to apologise before she goes home.

Wait OMG. The father is a stepdad?! Now that I didn’t expect.

“I’ll accept It’s just part of my job as a tutor”

Interesting.

Uh oh, stick snapped. You… You are walking to school together…

No, Itsuki just wants to stay with you Uesagi. >.>

Oh no Yotsuba. >.< You better not fail.

Ah, Nino, there is something bothering you but what is it. :O

Oh no Uesagi is considering suicide. 😦 😦 😦

Uesagi is sad. 😦 I don’t want to see him sad.

Wait… It wasn’t. What. What just happened. Was he hallucinating? What the hell. I don’t get it. I’m so confused. Was the girl he knew not any of the quintuplets? Or did one of them remember who he was and pretend….

I want answers, god damn it! Answers!

Anyway, there’s the stream of thoughts for the day.
I’ll be back next week for more wtf is going on in my head.

Cheers,
Rumanshi.

The Quintessential Quintuplets – Season 2, Episode 1 thoughts

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Note: The style here is stream of thought. So it won’t look or read very well, probably. Maybe I will do a more proper review later. Also, Spoilers! Duh!

Hi guys!
Hope you are all doing well. It’s 2AM and I’m not sleeping before work so I thought I may discuss the anime I’m watching.

Alright, first off – We open to protagonist talking with a sister.

Oh, hello other girls. Good to see you. He had a Flu? Why would you think it was going to kill him? I guess it’s understandable.

Ichika! That’s mean… Good to know she didn’t quit school (yet)? Oh, so that’s why you’re staying… Probably not the best reason but whatever.

Miku, that’s adorable. Oh, and Ichika joins in. Ahahaha! Oh, they left. I mean people giving you affection tends to make you feel better.

Vaccinations. Hmmm, interesting topic. DON’T SHOUT IN THE HOSPITAL.

Wait, was the doctor the father?!?!

I see, a memory. I wonder… Hallucination! Itsuki is here.

Why… Why do you study?

Angry face Itsuki is amusing. Sanada-kun is what the protagonist is like now… Interesting. I guess he felt guilty or something?

Is that their mother? No, just a plot point to introduce the young quint…

The hair colour got me, I think.

Itsuki wants to change?

So is Itsuki the young one that he met?

I see he finally realised something ahaha. No, man, no way is it a coincidence.

ITSUKI MIKU ITSUKI YOTSUBA ICHIKA

WRONG PEOPLE BUDDDDDD

That’s hilarious process.

And a lucky pervert event…

Yeah so I assumed it was Yotsuba too.

CALL ME A PERVERT (Holy shit!)

God dammit. -_-

There is definitely no sixth sister 0_0

Obviously had to be Ichika. Aha he worked it out.

And Busted! Wait so it was Ichika in the past? Ahaha, review time.

Oof, he made a mistake about Miku..

He’ll work it out, eventually. Probably. I have faith in this baka protagonist.

Alright, many apologies for the stream of thought, but this has been fun!
Cheers, Rumanshi!

Woopsie~~

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I apologise! I got so distracted in my head that I haven’t written anything new yet. Not to worry! I still intend on writing The Harem was a Forced Goal and I Have Unlimited Wives Slots. Will I do them at the same time? Maybe, maybe not. All I know is that I will be working on them. But I need to organise my personal space before I can do so, I think. I also got my job back, so I’ve been spending time doing that.

So:
– Clean up my workspace so I feel comfortable doing my writing.
– Write two? Chapters a week of The Harem was a Forced Goal.
– Profit.

And NaNoWriMo is almost upon us, so I will have no choice but to do it. 50k words minimum in a month. Let’s go, my friends!

Cheers,
Rumanshi.